Raising Our Children Well
We have an issue. There are too many children in the world being raised by us. Our imperfect parents handed down imperfect ways that we naturally use with our little ones. We mean well but how often do we find ourselves parenting in a way that we later regret? Who of us has had a truly perfect upbringing? Do we know how to raise our children well?
One of the most profound things I’ve learned on the journey of teaching, training, and raising children is the importance of your bond with your child. Years ago I was asked to co-lead a parenting group with my wife at our local church. The book, Loving Our Kids on Purpose by Danny Silk was the source of our study. The first (of many things) that leapt out to me was one that completely shifted my understanding of parenting. It was this idea that we are to parent our children the way God parents us. This may mean many different things to each of us depending on our view of God. For me, through the atonement of Jesus Christ, God, is loving, kind, patient, tender, truthful. He is always willing to forgive, slow to anger, patient, and His parenting style is to love you, without condition, teach you all things, warn you of pitfalls and errors while also letting you make your own choices. Even in the midst of a bad choice and an equally bad consequence, God is there waiting for you to turn to Him so he can comfort you, teach you, and draw you out of that place.
A parent like that is someone we’d want to listen to and learn from. It would be amazing to be unconditionally patient and kind, to teach them great ways to live, be truthful in what we say, have self control in the face of their disobedience, allow consequences to their actions, be there to comfort them and guide them out of the messes they make all while not damaging the relationship with frustration, anger, and power struggles.
It may seem impossible to do but I promise you… its not.
Jesus promised us these two things. “If you love me, you will keep my commandments. And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Helper, to be with you forever. John 13:14 esv.
One is the statement that love and obedience go hand in hand, the other is that God is very interested in helping you.
For the last 10 years I’ve been a personal journey to be the best father I can be. I first started by working with special needs children, then taking in foster care kiddos, and finally having 2 of my own. All this has taught me many things. I don’t claim to have all the answers. I don’t claim that my ways are perfect. But I can say with certainty that my life is dedicated to finding out the right way and living it out as best as possible. My hope is that I can share even one thing that will help you in raising your child. The journey of becoming a better parent is one that we’re all on. Our children deserve the best. We can give it to them.
